SevenSpoon

yOUR FAVorite: weeklEE texts

08-Feb-10

-I think I'm growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters

-What can I say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to

-It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.

-He was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...

-Omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this

-You need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY

-So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning

-A it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.

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New texTs .. .

29-Jan-10

-I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.

-How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???

-So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".

-Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.

-Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?

reply: he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?

-my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...

-I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!

-i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section

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